i went to ****'s blog . i read it . && i saw your name with another girl .
curiousity led me on . yes i read her blog further on . went to view the past pots .
&& i saw your face . your bastard face . i went to check her links .
&& i saw *******'s name . hoping she's not your girlfriend .
she is your girlfriend . she really is . (; wonderful job done .
read you girlfriend's blog . saw all of the pictures .
2 words :: fuck you .
any explanation from you telling me why you want to bastard her ?
why the fuck did you bastard your girlfriend ?
she's so fucking devoted to you , so caring to you , so patient .
she seems so nice to you . btu stories i heard from you is always that she's a bitch .
fuck you marcus fuck you . i hate you . you bastard your girlfriend .
that's your bloody buisness . why the fuck does it havta be me involving that matter ?
she loves you so much ; you know it . but you were never satisfied . why ?
saying she's unfaithful to you ; ask yourself , is it really her ?
you kept calling me i don't know why ; calling me idiotic names i don't know why ;
treating me so fucking nice i don't know why ; saying mushy shit i don't know why .
then i thought , maybe its worth be-friending you again ; then i realise .
oh fuck it hell big time , i shoulnt have talked to you again .
& justin , fuck , why din't you tell me anything ? why hide everything ?
brother so ? brother can go jihong other girls ?
i said i love my boyfriend . i said i love xiiao u , i said i love eugene ;
no matter what you guys said to me , i still want to be with him .
thanks for respecting it justin . && marcus ? why come talk to me again ?
why the fuck do you have to call me up && keep texting me again ?
so what if im unhappy with my boyfriend . it doesnt concern .
why show all that fucking fake & disgusting concern .? fuck off .
i thought mayb i could be friends with you again ; so i answered your calls .
allowed you to come down && ton with justin . meet up with you both .
but i never said i like you before ; && i never will .
i've made a vow ; i won't be unfaithful again .
&& i kept my words . i kept things clean ; kept a distance .
but why the fuck did you text & call me more often after that night ?
why can't you just understand that im attached .?
if only i had known that you had a girlfriend that is so devoted to you ,
i would never answer your calls or reply your messages .
&& if only someone cared to tell me more about what was happening ;
nothing would have happened , NOTHING ;
that night , that afternoon , i don't want a shit fuck from you !
not even a fucking bloody small fart from you fucker !!
i only wished that you never came & that you din't try to contact me again .!

but tell me , why is it that until now , im still so disturbed ?
why am i so fucking irritated & upset ?
marcus , you are a jerk . you don't deserve a slightest shit in this world .
i despise you . fucking despise you .

love , im so sorry for talking to him .
im sorry for everything . but love , if you hadn't bastard ;
nothing would have caused it to happen ;
&& why did things came in a way that i have to keep everything mum .?
not being to tell you anything , to tell you how torturing it is to keep quiet ?
love , we shared a love that no one was able to break .
but now we threw this love away && nothing could bring it back .
we are left with wishy-washy thoughts , & its all this coward acts that holds us .
dear i love you . i love you . i love you . i really do .


but one thing we both know , we no longer love each other so .

&& im pushing the blame to you & him .
cuz dearest , you never what i've been through .no one knew .
& how could i tell anyone bout it ?
yes only sister , etrah , jerald & i know . why was i able to tell them not you ?
yes why ? i never knew why , i was never able to explain .
could i for once let this matter go && forget everyone ; start refresh ?
baby , no . it's too late to turn back now .
marcus , i havent let you off , && i never will .
dear , one day i will let go , or maybe turn better .
etrah , i don't wish to have anymore friendship with you .
jerald , let's meet up soon . take great care . hope you don't go rtc .
sister , i won't forske you . i promise to whack that slut with you ; & we will .

i just want to be irresponsible for once ; just once please .